She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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