Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
