I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
