she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
My hand turned me down
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
