i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
