so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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