Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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