I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
