I wannas sexs uuuuu
tell your sister to shave her snatch
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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