garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
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