I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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