Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
