I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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