I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
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and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
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What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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