I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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