Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
