Texts From Last Night

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  (804): View more from Virginia

  my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.

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  (804): my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it. http://tfl.nu/l9cy
  Replies (18) Good night (4666) Bad night (607)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  farters have to be the big spoon...

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  (913): farters have to be the big spoon... http://tfl.nu/5j3w
  Replies (6) Good night (849) Bad night (2700)
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  (516): View more from New York

  I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.

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  (516): I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen. http://tfl.nu/vaik
  Replies (13) Good night (1371) Bad night (3740)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.

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  (315): it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right. http://tfl.nu/vsow
  Replies (10) Good night (1084) Bad night (3378)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.

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  (651): The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing. http://tfl.nu/9cqq
  Replies (15) Good night (5207) Bad night (1106)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  What?

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.

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  (484): THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH. (610): What? (484): A TROUGH FOR VOMIT. http://tfl.nu/8z8s
  Replies (17) Good night (3673) Bad night (3109)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese

  (315): View more from New York

  here comes the puke

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  (315): so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese (315): here comes the puke http://tfl.nu/32gj
  Replies (18) Good night (1133) Bad night (4473)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....

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  (813): Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night.... http://tfl.nu/k2vf
  Replies (3) Good night (2404) Bad night (1130)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids

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  (302): I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids http://tfl.nu/6v45
  Replies (15) Good night (1840) Bad night (1109)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night

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  (978): hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night http://tfl.nu/n6zz
  Replies (3) Good night (1947) Bad night (529)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.

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  (514): Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance. http://tfl.nu/bud1
  Replies (4) Good night (1279) Bad night (564)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.

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  (405): Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want. http://tfl.nu/hc2w
  Replies (1) Good night (554) Bad night (238)
• Favorite

  (228): View more from Mississippi

  He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing

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  (228): He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing http://tfl.nu/dsmd
  Replies (1) Good night (711) Bad night (481)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.

  (443): View more from Maryland

  Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.

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  (410): Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me. (443): Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life. http://tfl.nu/8aep
  Replies (5) Good night (692) Bad night (378)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing

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  (425): Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing http://tfl.nu/hqjw
  Replies (2) Good night (622) Bad night (260)

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