they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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