So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Randomize
