Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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