I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Randomize
