So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
