I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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