At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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