he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
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