Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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