It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
