Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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