Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
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