So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Randomize
