That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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