I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize