so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
