This girl is more easily done than said...
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
