This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
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