so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
We don't watch enough power rangers
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
