I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize