Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
