apparently the secret to your success is patron
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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