Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
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