He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
