Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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