4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
