nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
