I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
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