I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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