when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I intend to get homeless drunk
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Randomize
