He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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