So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Randomize
