If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Randomize