i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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